“How many of you are there personally?” he asked Cornelius.
“Me, personally? One I suppose.”
“Correct, one. And how many parents did you have?”
“Two.” Said Cornelius. “ Everybody has two, a mother and a father.”
“Correct again. And how many grandparents?”
“Four.” said Cornelius.
“And great-grandparents?”
“Eight.”
“And great-great-grandparents?”
“Sixteen.”
“And great-great-great-grandparents?”
”Thirty-two.”
“And so it goes on. Each generation you go back you double it. By the time you go back a mere twenty three generations, you have a figure in excess of four million people. Every one of which was necessary if you were ever to be born at all.”
Diologue with Hugo Rune, From Raiders of the Lost Car Park, Robert Rankin.
-----------------
Weekend Update:
Hello Darling!
Sometimes, I wish you could just gather up your other, take them back to the factory of the universe and say “hey- where’ my manual!” or “this one’s not working. Fix him... he’s broken.”
Imagine a 1-800-number direct to the factory floor.
If you can’t get a clear answer the first time, you can ask for the supervisor....
“maybe you’ve done something to void the warranty?”
“no way.... not a chance.”
“I don’t understand, we’ve never seen this unit behave this way before.”
“Nawh, this is a repetitive pattern. Definitely a pattern.”
“Can you return him as soon as possible, this sounds like a bug- probably a previous owner inputted some negative programming.”
“Can it be fixed?”
“Of course... but now that you mention it... maybe you should bring yourself in and get your settings checked as well, there may be a feedback loop.”
I say that in love, mostly. But really, don’t you think they should have manuals? And none of this “self-help Oprah book of the month club” stuff- I mean a real technical manual straight from the makers saying “Here’s the scoop.” (ok- she has some amazing books too)
I mean I’m known for being a drama queen, but this is the first time I’ve ever dated anyone who could actually match my style. Everything just seems to be amped up with the two of us. Lightning and water- explosive.
------------------------------
My friend Numen came to see me and brought me some coconuts. We had a good talk about a lot of things. He’s convinced Marvelous is really a dark soul who projects a lot of light- but as I see it- all that nothingness is just a screen for the infinate rays of his heart underneath.
And Numen, although incredibly accurate in his own ability to see others, does have the occasional blind spot. At least it seems so where Marvelous and I are concerned.
I had a useful visit w. the neurologist. She prescribed me a lot of drugs and i am starting to feel better. Funny how drugs can do that.
The electrolyte balance in my brain is wiped and I need to recharge it. I’ve been overstressed by personal and work life both. Type A personality drivers kicking in too much. Too many readings can do this apparently, and not getting regular sleep.
I am giving myself a lot of Reiki. Naturally this is helping. Love always does.
The trip home home to StarMansion on the bus from UBC wiped me out so much I slept for 8 hours- but when i woke up there was this magical facebook message from Marvellous asking how i was, and saying that he had been talking to some psychics about me and what i might take or do that could help-
he sounded quite concerned.
awwwww.... so sweet.
isn't it touching dont'cha think?
I hate to admit it but my heart predictably went all pitter patter blah bla bla.... so i wrote back, and he wrote back. That's pretty much it. He's staying with a girl on the island (a friend I must be clear to mention- he was clear that was all) and I am happy he's having a good time.
And last night he said he’s coming back on Wednesday. Which takes the wind out of my sails a little for dramatic effect..... so sorry to disappoint ya’ll.... So now I have hope that I will see him on valentines day.
I promise to update you on what happens and if it’s romantic..... or not. There is no guarantee he is still coming home to me- as much as my heart says it will be so.... my mind is stuck on the words when he left me and the words were not favorable.
And honestly, my heart beats for the man, but things just can not be the way they were. There are reasons I’m lying in this bed exhausted and in pain, and Marvelous is not here. I am going to have to guard myself and my time and energy this time, and no mistake.
The question for me is always, how do you have an open heart and keep yourself open for the best possibilities... and also keep yourself well and guarded against pain when the people you love let you down. And at heart, I guess you just don’t. You can’t be completely open, and also be closed at the same time. To love, to open your heart is to risk being hurt, to risk being abandoned, to risk the emptiness of loss as much as it is to risk the joy of co creation, the power of passionate coming together, the raw honesty of seeing someone for who they really are- and the bliss of being enfolded in the love of another and cared for.
You can’t have one without the other.
I feel good about myself right now and I don’t want to lose that. So I am going to have to be conscious about what I choose next. As we always shoud be. I happen to be very lucky in that if it doesn’t feel good I literally fall over or get ill almost immediately, so I can’t ignore it anymore.
The rest of the story is: everyone is sending love letters. I was on an internet radio show Saturday and will be doing some interviews online, as well as possibly hosting my own. Stay tuned for more updates as it becomes relevant.
I love not being at the studio right now. i am finally feeling a little better. still can't move much- but drugs are going to eventually kick in, I was actually able to eat a little oatmeal and a coconut (very slowly) today so I'm on the mend.
am writing lots and trying to meditate and center myself. i figure I'll be out of bed in a few days at the most... I hope. I might have to start paint balling from my window if I’m stuck in this room much longer. (Welcome home Marvelous!! lolololololol)
I'm resting lots and feeling happy in a lot of ways to be given a break. Now I just have to refocus. The doc said I can't work until the end of February minimum. Said the work environment wasn't conducive to healing. So I have a lot of free time on my hands. Wow... no man, no studio... no mind.... nothing but me in a big bed and writing and talking to friends and working on things I enjoy doing.......it really is kind of heaven. Hawaii would be better, but this'll do.
I'm going to have to come up with some creative new ways of working in the next while and the time is giving me a chance to look at starting my reiki practice again, which would be a great blessing to me, as i miss having my own practice very much.
So send me letters and love and keep in touch. Comment or throw me some suggestions or dreams. Ask me questions, or send me your struggles. I’m here and listening.
Till Next Time,
I send you a blessing of great light
that shoots down from the sky
hits you in the chest
and makes love to your heart.
Namaste OM
Love always
Summer
“Me, personally? One I suppose.”
“Correct, one. And how many parents did you have?”
“Two.” Said Cornelius. “ Everybody has two, a mother and a father.”
“Correct again. And how many grandparents?”
“Four.” said Cornelius.
“And great-grandparents?”
“Eight.”
“And great-great-grandparents?”
“Sixteen.”
“And great-great-great-grandparents?”
”Thirty-two.”
“And so it goes on. Each generation you go back you double it. By the time you go back a mere twenty three generations, you have a figure in excess of four million people. Every one of which was necessary if you were ever to be born at all.”
Diologue with Hugo Rune, From Raiders of the Lost Car Park, Robert Rankin.
-----------------
Weekend Update:
Hello Darling!
Sometimes, I wish you could just gather up your other, take them back to the factory of the universe and say “hey- where’ my manual!” or “this one’s not working. Fix him... he’s broken.”
Imagine a 1-800-number direct to the factory floor.
If you can’t get a clear answer the first time, you can ask for the supervisor....
“maybe you’ve done something to void the warranty?”
“no way.... not a chance.”
“I don’t understand, we’ve never seen this unit behave this way before.”
“Nawh, this is a repetitive pattern. Definitely a pattern.”
“Can you return him as soon as possible, this sounds like a bug- probably a previous owner inputted some negative programming.”
“Can it be fixed?”
“Of course... but now that you mention it... maybe you should bring yourself in and get your settings checked as well, there may be a feedback loop.”
I say that in love, mostly. But really, don’t you think they should have manuals? And none of this “self-help Oprah book of the month club” stuff- I mean a real technical manual straight from the makers saying “Here’s the scoop.” (ok- she has some amazing books too)
I mean I’m known for being a drama queen, but this is the first time I’ve ever dated anyone who could actually match my style. Everything just seems to be amped up with the two of us. Lightning and water- explosive.
------------------------------
My friend Numen came to see me and brought me some coconuts. We had a good talk about a lot of things. He’s convinced Marvelous is really a dark soul who projects a lot of light- but as I see it- all that nothingness is just a screen for the infinate rays of his heart underneath.
And Numen, although incredibly accurate in his own ability to see others, does have the occasional blind spot. At least it seems so where Marvelous and I are concerned.
I had a useful visit w. the neurologist. She prescribed me a lot of drugs and i am starting to feel better. Funny how drugs can do that.
The electrolyte balance in my brain is wiped and I need to recharge it. I’ve been overstressed by personal and work life both. Type A personality drivers kicking in too much. Too many readings can do this apparently, and not getting regular sleep.
I am giving myself a lot of Reiki. Naturally this is helping. Love always does.
The trip home home to StarMansion on the bus from UBC wiped me out so much I slept for 8 hours- but when i woke up there was this magical facebook message from Marvellous asking how i was, and saying that he had been talking to some psychics about me and what i might take or do that could help-
he sounded quite concerned.
awwwww.... so sweet.
isn't it touching dont'cha think?
I hate to admit it but my heart predictably went all pitter patter blah bla bla.... so i wrote back, and he wrote back. That's pretty much it. He's staying with a girl on the island (a friend I must be clear to mention- he was clear that was all) and I am happy he's having a good time.
And last night he said he’s coming back on Wednesday. Which takes the wind out of my sails a little for dramatic effect..... so sorry to disappoint ya’ll.... So now I have hope that I will see him on valentines day.
I promise to update you on what happens and if it’s romantic..... or not. There is no guarantee he is still coming home to me- as much as my heart says it will be so.... my mind is stuck on the words when he left me and the words were not favorable.
And honestly, my heart beats for the man, but things just can not be the way they were. There are reasons I’m lying in this bed exhausted and in pain, and Marvelous is not here. I am going to have to guard myself and my time and energy this time, and no mistake.
The question for me is always, how do you have an open heart and keep yourself open for the best possibilities... and also keep yourself well and guarded against pain when the people you love let you down. And at heart, I guess you just don’t. You can’t be completely open, and also be closed at the same time. To love, to open your heart is to risk being hurt, to risk being abandoned, to risk the emptiness of loss as much as it is to risk the joy of co creation, the power of passionate coming together, the raw honesty of seeing someone for who they really are- and the bliss of being enfolded in the love of another and cared for.
You can’t have one without the other.
I feel good about myself right now and I don’t want to lose that. So I am going to have to be conscious about what I choose next. As we always shoud be. I happen to be very lucky in that if it doesn’t feel good I literally fall over or get ill almost immediately, so I can’t ignore it anymore.
The rest of the story is: everyone is sending love letters. I was on an internet radio show Saturday and will be doing some interviews online, as well as possibly hosting my own. Stay tuned for more updates as it becomes relevant.
I love not being at the studio right now. i am finally feeling a little better. still can't move much- but drugs are going to eventually kick in, I was actually able to eat a little oatmeal and a coconut (very slowly) today so I'm on the mend.
am writing lots and trying to meditate and center myself. i figure I'll be out of bed in a few days at the most... I hope. I might have to start paint balling from my window if I’m stuck in this room much longer. (Welcome home Marvelous!! lolololololol)
I'm resting lots and feeling happy in a lot of ways to be given a break. Now I just have to refocus. The doc said I can't work until the end of February minimum. Said the work environment wasn't conducive to healing. So I have a lot of free time on my hands. Wow... no man, no studio... no mind.... nothing but me in a big bed and writing and talking to friends and working on things I enjoy doing.......it really is kind of heaven. Hawaii would be better, but this'll do.
I'm going to have to come up with some creative new ways of working in the next while and the time is giving me a chance to look at starting my reiki practice again, which would be a great blessing to me, as i miss having my own practice very much.
So send me letters and love and keep in touch. Comment or throw me some suggestions or dreams. Ask me questions, or send me your struggles. I’m here and listening.
Till Next Time,
I send you a blessing of great light
that shoots down from the sky
hits you in the chest
and makes love to your heart.
Namaste OM
Love always
Summer
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